Hippos; I call them "Water Rhinos". I'M NOT CRAZY! In spite of their adorable appearance, hippos do not make great pets. Nobody ever considers that you'll need a litter box the size of a Volkswagen bus. Which is why animal shelters are full of hippos. It's pretty sad.
Today's photos can't be called "Snoozles™", which is breaking the Sunday format, but as you can see, the pictures themselves aren't bad - in fact they are pretty good, no heads in the way, they are clear, the color hasn't faded... they are just a little bit dark. But my "scans" folder is lacking any truly awful examples. Happily!
One hippo stares at us with a beady eye, while another prepares to burst through the surface, making people (not me!) shriek in surprise. That part of the river looks like a swell place to live, if I was a hippo I'd want to be there too.
Are these the same two hippos? Who can tell? This is why all hippos should wear name tags. They don't have to be Disney name tags, but I admit that that would be nice. I always bring a pack of mints, because "hippo breath" is not great. Toss in a few mints, and they are kissably fresh!
Walt should have had the hippos spit venom at guests, just like Dilophosaurus! I know that Dilophosaurus didn't really do that, and that Michael Chrichton was just taking artistic license. Walt should have done the same!
ReplyDeleteSo Major, will there be no more Snoozles™, for the time being?
Thanks for the great vintage hippo pics, Major!
"Which is why animal shelters are full of hippos. It's pretty sad." Yes, it truly is sad. Parents see the cute little one-ton hippos in the pet shop and think, "what a nice surprise for little Timmy on Easter morning!". Then, after the hippo rampages through the house, knocking over tables, chairs, the family's heirloom Ming vase, and Gramma, it crashes through the sliding glass door and out onto the patio. From there, it's on to the rest of the neighborhood, leaving a path of destruction everywhere it goes. Cops are called, tranquilizer darts are fired, and the cute little one-ton hippo winds up in the slammer at the animal shelter. People never learn.
ReplyDeleteThis IS a nice picture. But, you know, it's hippos.... again. All we can see of the submerged hippo is the tip of his ear, and some of his pinkish head under the water. I can't remember, did these submersible hippos have any animation? Ear twitching? Mouth opening up?
Ah. The classic 'gaping maw' hippo. I can see why parents would want to bring this home to little Timmy. And it provides a nice big target for some of Major's breath mints. Hopefully, Timmy's parents will also provide him with a pistol to let the impish hippo know who's boss.
Tokyo!, venom-spitting hippos (a great rock band name!) would be fantastic! Imagine the shocked, bemused expressions on guests faces after getting slimed with hippo venom! Such an immersive experience! Of course, this would require an upcharge, but definitely worth it, especially if it included a Zinger and 5 grapes!
I shall make no more harmful remarks about these pictures, for I have taken the hippocratic oath. Thanks, Major.
”That part of the river looks like a swell place to live, if I was a hippo I'd want to be there too.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think I’d feel comfortable living in that neighborhood. Too much thru traffic and random gunfire. I guess I’ve spent too many years living in the suburbs.
JB, we’re going to hold you to that oath. We wouldn’t want you accused of being a hippocrite.
A long time ago (early 80's), I sat right next to a hippo pool at the San Diego Zoo. I was really close. My back was to the pool. I then hear this sound of water and turned around. There rising above me was this huge hippo with mouth gaping open and making a loud sound. Nearly gave me a heart attack
ReplyDeleteI always enjoy hippo pool pics. Thanks, Major.
These hippos look hungry, good thing you had after-dinner mints. You can fool them into forgetting they were hungry because mints are served only after the meal, so they think they’ve already eaten.
ReplyDeleteThat is quite a stretch of water in photo 1, makes the River look very wide.
I too shall take the oath and cease ridiculing hippos. They have their place in the world and I hope it’s far away from mine.
Ken, that’s quite a story. I would be very wary of hippos ever afterward.
Thanks Major!
JG
TokyoMagic!, hippos should also have those “umbrella frills” like the Dilophosaurs had. Only they should be sparkly. Oh don’t worry, I’m sure I’ll have plenty of Snoozles real soon! I just had a temporary shortage.
ReplyDeleteJB, nobody ever thinks about the fact that a hippo becomes a part of the family. They are not a toy, they are a full-time commitment. When will we ever learn? I think that even the submerging hippos could have wiggling ears or opening mouths, but to be honest I don’t remember for certain. One of the most fun things to do with a pet hippo is feed them watermelons or pumpkins, it’s like a normal pet eating an apple. I agree that “Venom Spitting Hippos” is a good name for a band, and wish that I could buy all of their records (including the rare 7” singles on colored vinyl). Disneyland could have a special drink in Adventureland called “Hippo Venom”.
Chuck, after a few months, you won’t be able to sleep without the sound of gunfire and revving motor boats. It’s sort of a comforting ASMR!
K. Martinez, it sounds like that hippo was hoping to make a snack out of you! If you’d been holding a bottle of A1 steak sauce, it would have been all over.
JG, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a hippo that didn’t look hungry. And while those animals are cute, they are pretty dumb, not a single one of them could do even simple mathematics. I watched “Disneyland: Handcrafted” (it’s on YouTube) again, what a fascinating documentary, and it’s so amazing to see the park (and the Jungle River) being carved out of Anaheim farmland. It’s so crazy to think that there are hippos in Columbia, having escaped from Pablo Escobar’s zoo!
I had a neighbor who fell and needed hippo replacement surgery.
ReplyDelete